week 11, post 3

I thought an important aspect discussed in this chapter was maintaing equity in family relationships. First, the importance for making fairness a high priority within the family is high and is a key component in a healthy family. fairness is also important because no one person in the family deserves the entire responsibility to maintain the family.

Two theories that that explain why equity is positive for maintaining a healthy families are the social exchange theory and the equity theory. The equity theory is is defined as “fairness, based on the perception that both people invest equally in a relationship and benefit similarly from there investments” (p. 318) If this is holds true, than that relationship is positive. 

The social exchange theory talks about how people conduct cost-benefit analyses and that if the benefit out weights the cost, then that relationship is positive.  These two theories are important explain how fairness is important in a family setting. 

week 11, post 2

Some of the trends that have been discussed in this chapter are a high divorce rate, especially among those who have already gotten one. I think this trend will continue to grow over time because it has become more acceptable among our generation. The kids growing up now have seen the amount of divorce that takes place and because of this divorce will be more acceptable when they grow older and marry. I think another trend that will continue to grow is the amount of single parents. The superstars that are culture values are not responsible parents, they are children with to much money that go around and party all the time. I think that this will shape the future of marriage, or the lack of marriage, because people will want to stay single longer. Lastly, i think that over the next 50 years we will see a decrease in the amount of children that people have. It has already gone down a lot, but i think it will continue to lower because the lack of resources this over crowded earth has.

week 11, post 1

My definition of family are the people that i am really close with. I do not think that family should be limited to blood related only because there are a select few people that I consider my family but are not related to me. I think that family members do things for each other without expecting something in return. When you do a favor for people you expect something in return. I think that most people would think that my definition is wrong because there are many people that do not know everyone in there family or do not like everyone in there family. Because of this, those people would not do things for those people. I think that culture affects the definition of family, and is why it is different for everyone.

week 10 post 3

This is an interesting point that the chapter discusses and i personally believe that it is unethical to purposely misrepresent your self over the internet. I think that it is unethical because the reasons behind representing yourself inaccurately is to hide reasons in which if other people know that may not communicate with you. I think that deception is more likely in an online setting, but happens in both settings. I think that this is because it is easier to deceive someone over the internet because it is easy to represent yourself as something you are not on the internet. I think that deception is is not limited to online setting, i just think that more people are capable of online deception because it is easier to achieve. It takes a smarter person that deceive someone that is looking right at them, and is why more people use deception online. 

week 10 post 2

something that i fond interesting in chapter 11 was the styles of loving. The three styles of loving discussed in the book are Eros, Storge, and Ludus. The eros style is powerful, intense love that may include sexual, spiritual, intellectual, or emotional attraction. this style is known to be the most spontaneous type of love and is also the fastest moving one. 

Storge type of love is less intense that Eros. It is known as the love based on friendship and compatibility.  This type of love tends to develop of a longer period of time and because of this is more likely to be peaceful and stable. The highs and lows do not compare with an Eros based love relationship. 

finally, ludus love is know as the playful love. these type of lovers see love as a game and a “lighthearted adventure full of challenges, puzzles, and fun”. People tend to go through ludic stages in life but are not true ludics. 

week 10 post 1

I have been in a situation where commitment was present in a relationship but not love. First, the difference between love and commitment in a relationship is this. Commitment is “ the intention to remain involved with a relationship”, whereas love is defined as “intensely positive feelings fervent desire for another person” (p. 277) While it is ideal that you have both while in a relationship, there are plenty situations where only one of these are present. In my situation, I was committed to a girl, but did not love her. She was a really good friend of mine but i did not have the feelings that i thought i had for her. I wanted to stay in the relationship because i did not want to hurt her. The relationship dragged on and eventually ended. i think i can conclude that you need both love and commitment for a relationship to work the best. If you love a girl, but do not want to be committed to only her, then she will find someone who will. 

week 9 post 2

I thought this was a interesting site. Never thought that something like this excised but i guess there is a site for anything if you looked for it. The site was good because it offered good advice in the advice forum for things to do in a friendship. I think this was good because a lot of time people go and get into situations that they have never delt with before. This page offers advice on a few topics discussed in the book like sexual attention advice and relationship advice. It also gets into friendships and the the types of things that you need to have in a strong friendship. I think the the things represented on the website show the real problems in relationships and friendships. A lot of the same things are mentioned in the book which to me shows that the problems talked about in the book are actually problems that people encounter in real life. My experience is that things that books talk about are don’t always happen in real life all the time, and the book does a good job at explaining the real problems in relationships 

week 9 post 1

Mikey and I have been very close friends ever since middle school. The investments that i have made for this friendship include time, effort, thought and feeling. I think the biggest investment though would be time. I can remember hanging out with him all day. The only time that we did not hang out was during class. We spent time together at school, on the football field, baseball field, and he lived up the street from me. I think all the time that was spent together allowed the other investments to gradually build up, and is why our friendship is so tight.

I think the way we built trust was originally from playing competitive sports together. On the football field i had to be confident that he was going to do his job so that i could do mine. If i tried to do both of our assignments then i would bot be able to get anything done, so i had to be confident that he could get it done. From that i started to trust Mikey. 

Football also helped me accept mikey. Football is a great sport because it reveals  true character. There is no hiding who you are on the football field. So after playing ball with mike i knew what kind of person he was and i was okay with that.